Season of thanks and trials: The power of practicing gratitude
Mental health experts offer strategies for overcoming the holiday blues.
As days grow shorter, temperatures drop and leaves begin to fall, feelings of sadness and depression surface for many — even during a season when “thankful, grateful, blessed” is showcased on décor and T-shirts. Factors like seasonal depression (also called seasonal affective disorder) and navigating the holidays after the loss of a loved one can deepen those feelings during a time stereotypically associated with joy. But gratitude may play a bigger role than expected, according to two experts from the Texas A&M University Health Science Center (Texas A&M Health).
Harvesting hope
Isaac Saldivar, clinical psychologist at the Texas A&M Health Telehealth Institute, regularly turns to gratitude and positivity in his practice.
“One of the ingredients in healing is vulnerability, but another part of that recipe is gratitude,” Saldivar said. “Being able to cultivate a practice of gratitude is really important, because the negative things we focus on can cultivate this kind of dark or depressed mood. We water that way of thinking when we focus on negative things. But when we focus on positive things, even though it can be difficult, positivity will grow.”
Often, people experience dissonance between feeling sad, down or depressed and wanting to be in the spirit of the season, he said, and sometimes, it may seem like you have nothing to be positive about or grateful for. But starting small can help blossom a larger habit of practice, he said.
“Gratitude is such a huge part of being positive, because when we’re grateful for little things, even just movement or health, we grow an aspect of appreciation,” Saldivar said.
Nurturing positivity can sometimes feel pointless, especially in difficult seasons, but Saldivar emphasized that consistency and perseverance in practicing gratitude can gradually make a difference. Over time, regularly noticing small things to appreciate helps foster a habit of gratitude and encourages a more positive mindset. Even when things seem hopeless, he continued, starting with those small moments can lead to a perspective shift — making positivity, rather than negativity, a more automatic response.
Daily doses of thanks
James Deegear, associate director of clinical services at Texas A&M University Health Services, said he often starts patients with small practices of gratitude.
“Gratitude is one of the tools in my toolkit that I use quite often,” Deegear said. “I tell patients to think of somebody who has impacted their life and reach out to thank them. Taking time to write and share — that really has positive benefits on mental health.”
A small habit he said can improve mood and overall perspective is taking time to list out three things you appreciate each day, even if they are small, like the invention of bandages or your favorite beverage. This practice is one both Deegear and Saldivar use daily in their profession.
Deegear said another small shift you can make is spending more time outside. Mental Health America suggests spending time in green spaces and sunshine to boost mental health by increasing production of serotonin and vitamin D, especially as the days shorten and the weather cools down for extended periods.
“One thing I have heard and loved is ‘participate versus spectate,’” Deegear said. “You can either let things passively happen to you or you can actively participate in your mental health. There’s something to honoring how you really feel, so let yourself feel the feelings, but also participate in your recovery and overall wellness.”
Tidings of sadness
Sometimes life can get hard, Salvidar said. When gratitude seems to be all around, yet simultaneously out of reach, he recommends taking an active role in improving your outlook.
When depression or sadness comes knocking, it may become difficult to answer the door to more cheerful thoughts or joyful experiences, and sometimes it’s OK to sit with depression for a bit, Saldivar said. But he noted that it’s important we let depression know when it has overstayed its welcome and you have other plans. To help show depression the door, he suggests writing a poem about a lost loved one, a letter to a dear friend, practicing mindfulness or just soaking up some time in the sun.
Salvidar cited a story he heard from a spiritual Native American healer:
“I don’t mind if depression is here, because it is a part of me,” he remembered. “But in this relationship, the boundaries we’ve had aren’t working for me anymore, and I need to set new ones.”
Life isn’t always easy, and the holiday season can sometimes intensify feelings of loss or sadness. But practicing gratitude may offer an important path to healing. Even when gratitude feels out of reach, starting small can nurture growing positivity and foster a new perspective. Through these practices, we remind ourselves that difficulty and gratitude can coexist, helping us find light even in the darkest of seasons.
“There are no storms that last forever,” Salidvar said. “And I love being able to provide hope to people by saying that there is a route to getting better. Even though, yes, you are going through a difficult time right now, there’s also a roadmap to healing where the sun comes out and there’s a brighter day.”
